Squid Pro Quo 2

Bailey hadn’t been able to do much for him over the phone. He’d told him to go lie down and if it got worse to ring him back. No one knew what the hell kind of bacteria something like that would have on it so the fact that he had a dodgy stomach wasn’t exactly the biggest surprise ever. It may have been the stupidest thing that he had ever done. Not the stupidest thing he would ever do, but up to this moment

It could of course just be the worst case of upset stomach that he had ever had – what kind of remedy could you take for this sort of thing though? Damn, whatever was happening to him it was happening at a pretty rapid rate. His vision was flickering, blind spots firing up and dying down like fireflies in negative. His hearing also seemed to be dialing through the spectrum of audible sounds. Wow, was he going to actually benefit from this in the end. The pain shot through him and he jack-knifed – goddamn, he needed to do something and do it quickly.

He once again reached for the phone and hit the number one.


‘Uh, yeah. Something is happening to me.’

‘Dumb, Deek. Fucken dumb. I’m coming over and I’m bringing Coltard.’

‘Ah, shit.’

‘What? Yule ‘ave to get over yer rivalry with him. ‘E’s saved ar bacon more than once.’

Deek let out a strangled noise and dropped the phone. The pigment of his skin had changed, or rather it was changing – cycling through various shades of green. Damn, Bailey was right – he had been fucking stupid. What kind of moron chows down on a creature from some other dimension before carrying out tests on it? Was he really that hungry? Had he ever been that hungry? No – shit, he had a full larder. It was all so unnecessary. Thank God, Bailey didn’t live too far away – that had to be him at the door now. He never locked it and Bailey never knocked so he didn’t have to worry about dragging himself down there to answer. Nope – Bailey came lumping up the stairs.

‘Oh shit.’


‘Jeez-us, man you look rough.’

Coltard so wanted to snicker. He looked at Deek and he saw something and he wasn’t exactly sure how to describe it and he had seen some weird fucked up shit in his time. Seeing someone who professed to being a professional hunter of the monstrous sporting squid tentacles and developing a beak was not something you came across everyday. He would have laughed if it were not for some of the psychic emanations that he was picking up, suggesting that something were coming through from a higher dimension.

‘Goddamn it, Bailey, can you sense the broadcast that he is kicking out? There’s never anything that makes that much racket on those frequencies – all those artifacts we find tend to have a slightly dulled action even when they’re drenched in blood. He’s become some kind of superbeacon. Has this happened to him before?’

‘Well, ‘e’s been complainin’ that there’s been a rash of invasions of his bedroom.’

‘One of them did this to him – it infected him and I sure as hell don’t know how to burn it out.’

‘Crap. ‘S why I brought you here.’

‘Oh, you’ll need me to fight the fuckers. Let’s get him down into the van – the lead shield should dampen his signal a bit hopefully.’s